Umbrella Coalition

I've got a theory. Somewhere out there, waiting to take over this world, is a coalition of umbrellas. They hide underground, and plot to overthrow the current governments. Their numbers are swelling by the day, and they are on a recruiting spree.

Nothing else can explain why so many umbrellas that I buy just disappear!! :(

The song "I am sixteen, going on seventeen" carries a very different meaning for me nowadays.